Sunday, November 21, 2010

Diary of a Female Pimp: Chapter 1 "The Morning After"

The morning after a night of hard partying is always a bitch. I woke up in a house that wasn't familiar, with people I didn't recognize and my ass hurt. I had the headache of a lifetime. I didn't question the ass pain too much because I was in a house full of women, but then again.....never mind. I searched around for my phone and immediately called my girls. I hear a phone in a neighboring room and soon realize that my girls were all safe and sound with me. A few minutes later I see a gorgeous looking woman come into the bedroom with a tray of food. It was "Honey", my Brazilian boo. Apparently, I stayed at the club until after hours and continued drinking with the owner and his cronies. They put us in a limo and we ended up in this big ass house in Davie, FL. I didn't realize how big this house was until about a good hour and a half of sobering up. This mother fucker had a West wing and an East wing in that bitch. He had a full size Olympic pool in what I think was his backyard. The shit was about as big as the parking lot of Sawgrass Mills Mall. (look it up) I later found out this was one of the many homes of the owner that he called the "party house." A fucking 3.7 million dollar house is your "party house?" His "guest house" was a 4 bedroom 3.5 bathroom on its own acre of land. This was just a completely different type of living. My Brazilian boo "Honey" told me that I threw up on myself and was a complete mess. This wonderful woman stripped me completely naked, ran me a tub of bubble bath water and washed every part of my body. I was wondering why I smelled so damn good after a night of sweating so hard. I will never forget, she made me scrambled eggs with cheese, some toast and a cup of coffee. By this time my girls had woken up and we started reminiscing about our evening.(at least what we remembered) One of the lady's in the house came to us and said our ride was outside to take us back to our cars. Honey was so sad to see me go, I was starting to believe she might actually really like me. I gave her my number and told her to call me so we could hang out sometime. As I was walking to the limo my phone went off, it was a text. It was Honey with her broken English and she said, "I am so happy I you meet and I promise you will see me soon beleza preta." Damn, Nina!! What the fuck happened last night???!!! When we entered the limo the driver pulled down the barrier window and told me I have a call coming through on line one, make sure you answer. I answered the phone and it was the owner I spoke with last night. He wanted to make sure I didn't forget what we spoke about and asked that I come to the club to start working that Friday. Oh shit!! This mother fucker was serious!!! He asked that I wear black leather pants and he would provide my shirt. During the ride home I had to slowly start to wrap my head around what I just agreed to. I know that the liquor had alot to do with my decision but I have never been the one to back out from a commitment or easy money. This man was saying I could potentially bring home $1000.00 cash a night. I figured, if he was bullshitting me that would be my easy out. Then I could go back to my normal scheduled program as I knew it.

The shit was official, I could now add "cocktail waitress" to my resume.....What I didn't know is that I would soon be adding another title to my resume..........

Did you miss the intro? Click on the "Diary of a Female Pimp" tab up top to get caught  up

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